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Although Santa may be a resident of the North Pole, when he flies over Scotland, he is subject to the laws of our land. In Scotland, legally there is a presumption against gift. In simplistic terms that means that in the absence of any evidence to the contrary, if you can prove you provided someone with an item, then the assumption is it was a loan and not a gift. Meaning Santa – the person who provided the item – can then legally demand it back. If you can’t give it back (e.g. you’ve eaten the entire Ferrero Rocher chocolate mountain!), you could be forced to pay the giver compensation.

Now Santa, of course, swings down your chimney, dumps the goodies, and vanishes.   So, do the goodies left by him remain his property? Or are you at risk of a legal demand from Donner & Blitzen Solicitors, Lapland, to return the deodorant set, the 17 pairs of Christmas themed socks, and the cinnamon scented candle collection? Can you spray the old oxters, slip on your new socks, and relax in your scent filled paradise, safe in the knowledge that the law is not an ass (or a reindeer)?

The real question is, can you displace the presumption that what Santa left was NOT a gift. Santa need prove nothing. He can cosy up with Mrs Claus and the elves and stay happily at home at the North Pole, knowing full well the burden of proof rests with you. Let the battle commence.

Well, many people would argue that the items are of course a gift and not a loan by the simple fact that Santa holds himself out as a “gift giver” and, especially, one who exists solely to give gifts at one specific time of year i.e. Christmas Eve. But would that argument survive proper analysis in courtroom?

Problem 1 – who will give evidence that Santa is a gift giver? You could call the population of the world to give evidence, and they could all say it’s a well-known fact that Santa gives gifts. But, under cross examination, what will they say when asked “how do you know that?”. “I heard Santa say it” they’ll say. “Ah,” asks the brilliant but modest lawyer, “but was the Santa you heard speaking the REAL Santa”. The witness is dumbfounded. As we all know, 99.9999% of all known Santas are, in cruel fact, impostors.

Problem 2 – is Santa, when delivering the goodies, in a position to pass on ownership title to the goodies? If the label on the item left by Santa reads, “From Aunty Mabel, with love” then it’s clearly implied that Santa, just like Evri or Yodel, is acting only as an agent in the delivery of the goods. You might then try and argue that Aunty Mabel (not Santa) passed on title to you as the “donor” of the gift, but the chances are that you got drunk on Christmas Day, told Aunty Mabel about her bad breath problem, and with that she will not be disposed to bailing you out with an acknowledgement that the Readers Digest Annual 2022 was hers to give.

Problem 3 – you’re being sued by Santa. In a battle of credibility, who is going to believe you in preference to Santa? Santa has been given the highly responsible task of knowing who’s been naughty and who’s been nice. He’s basically a judge, and try telling the judge in Court not to believe his/her fellow judge. Excuse the Christmas pun, but your goose is cooked!

So our advice to you is, get proof of ownership in writing. Leave Santa a little note next to the milk, cookies and carrots. “These treats are given to you, Santa, on the express basis that you sign here to acknowledge that A) you own the goodies; and B) you hereby gift the goodies to me and/or my nominee of choice.” And be ready to clamp his sleigh until he signs!

Merry Christmas,

The Macnabs Grinch